AJ's CV

I posted this CV on various websites and emailed a bunch of people advertising jobs.

Almost immediately I had an email from a gentleman who is a senior recruitment consultant for a company which I will not disclose here. The email read:

"Are you having a laugh?"

I will respond to him, but first, here's the CV:

Curriculum Vitae for Artemis Jones

Name: Artemis Jones

D.O.B: 31/09/80

Star Sign: Libra

Greatest Fear: Jellyfish

Favourite Film: Legally Blonde 2, Red, White and Blonde
Email Address: jonesartemis@yahoo.com

Phone Number: Rather not say

Education:

1990 – 1991: Burdett-Couttt & Townshend Foundation CE VA Primary School
1991 – 1993: Archbishop Sumners C of E Primary School

1993 – 1995: St Georges Cathedral RC Primary School

1995 – 1998: Vincent Rhymes School

1998 – 1999: Sanderson’s Centre for Criminally Insane Youths

Qualifications:

I have wun a GCSE in Workshop Class. I made a box out of different woods and glues amd it was well brilliant.

My Life Story:

I had a little bit of trouble fittings in at the schools. I didn’t mean to be misbehaved but a lots of the times I was asked to go away and never to come back to the schools again, which means I am crying at the night sometime and make mess. But now I am 28 years of ages and I am very happy.

Work Experience:

When I was at Vincent Rhymes I learn to mop up a bit.

At the SCCIY in 1999 I did a lot of work experiencing in gardens therapy and in painting aswell.

Special Skills, Talents, Abilities and Stuff:

I can run fasterly than the wind.

I like to jump off from tables and ladders.

I am good at strokings cat.

I can draw fierce creature.

I like to run very quickly.

I hate to be readings, but I like watch the cartoon.

My brother’s friend has a rabbit.

I am goodly at running.

Interests, Extra-Curricula Activities:

Bake cake, make peoples from paper, eat cake, enjoying the long walking on the beaches, design traps for the mouses, looking through the windows curtain at the peoples on the streets, capture the mouses, take the photography of my schrammer, executing the mouses, jumping into the puddle (splash), anything which is blue and some of the things which is green.

Why You Want to Hire Me:

You may live to being very ancient and never be met someone as goodly as the one person who I am being but I am the one who is the best candidates for your work. I have been through the many things which are difficult and I am still very muchly alives so you should think abobut making me the one in your company. Aslo, I will maybe be your boss one days so you should be very goods to me be! Ha ha ha ha ha.

You may emailing me on jonesartemis@yahoo.com to telling me I have got the job,

Thanks you.

AJ